Saturday, September 30, 2006
Free Books
Ebooks free for the downloading, along with movies and sheet music. No, you aren't going to find the latest best seller or hot ticket, but you will find old classics and forgotten favorites. http://worldebookfair.com/Collections.htm usually charges $8.95 per year for access to thier collection, but you can review it for free, and download to your heart's desire, for a month, beginning October 15.
Sunday, September 17, 2006
Picking Up Your Cross
Today's Gospel said: He summoned the crowd with his disciples and said to them,
“Whoever wishes to come after me must deny himself,
take up his cross, and follow me.
For whoever wishes to save his life will lose it,
but whoever loses his life for my sake
and that of the gospel will save it.”
What does it mean to "pick up your cross"? Tonite at mass, Fr. said that it means to accept suffering as a part of life and to look to Jesus to get you through it. That seems to be a common thought, but its one I question. Most suffering in life is not something we choose in any sense of the word. Where is the self-denial in accepting what we cannot change? If I get cancer, is that a cross? How is the way I deal with it any differnt from the way a non-Christian (or even anti-religious) person deals with it? Yes, I turn to God in prayer, but at the same time, I'm doing the same things as the other guy--trying to get rid of the cancer. Personally, I don't think things I have no choice about are crosses.
I think a cross is something that will bring me pain if I choose to pick it up--but which I don't have to choose. It is the choice to remain faithful to the Church's teaching on contraception, even if it is difficult for me. It is the choice to carry a handicapped or fatally ill fetus to term, rather than to do the sensible thing and abort. It is the choice to tell my daughter that she can't wear that, even if all the other kids are, because it is immodest. It is the choice to speak up (and be branded a fanatic or prude) when someone is telling dirty or ethnic jokes. It is making the choice not to tell the Islamic captors that I'll pray to Allah. Most of these choices aren't near so dramatic as His cross, nor so painful--but many of them can be very hard for us to make.
“Whoever wishes to come after me must deny himself,
take up his cross, and follow me.
For whoever wishes to save his life will lose it,
but whoever loses his life for my sake
and that of the gospel will save it.”
What does it mean to "pick up your cross"? Tonite at mass, Fr. said that it means to accept suffering as a part of life and to look to Jesus to get you through it. That seems to be a common thought, but its one I question. Most suffering in life is not something we choose in any sense of the word. Where is the self-denial in accepting what we cannot change? If I get cancer, is that a cross? How is the way I deal with it any differnt from the way a non-Christian (or even anti-religious) person deals with it? Yes, I turn to God in prayer, but at the same time, I'm doing the same things as the other guy--trying to get rid of the cancer. Personally, I don't think things I have no choice about are crosses.
I think a cross is something that will bring me pain if I choose to pick it up--but which I don't have to choose. It is the choice to remain faithful to the Church's teaching on contraception, even if it is difficult for me. It is the choice to carry a handicapped or fatally ill fetus to term, rather than to do the sensible thing and abort. It is the choice to tell my daughter that she can't wear that, even if all the other kids are, because it is immodest. It is the choice to speak up (and be branded a fanatic or prude) when someone is telling dirty or ethnic jokes. It is making the choice not to tell the Islamic captors that I'll pray to Allah. Most of these choices aren't near so dramatic as His cross, nor so painful--but many of them can be very hard for us to make.
Friday, September 15, 2006
My 9/11 Memories
Where was I that September day? I was sitting in the office of the special ed coordinator at my son's school, trying to get some problems resolved. Someone in the office said they heard there had been a plane crash, but I figured "accident--awful, get on with life" and went in to talk to Mr. B. While we were talking, he got a call from home, and was obviously very upset. By the time I got back out to the main office area, the second plane had crashed. I drove to work and listened to the radio. Either during the drive or shortly after getting to the office, the third crash was known. At the office (I work in a high rise building) everyone was crowded around the TV sets and lots of folks were in tears. The office manager said that anyone who thought s/he have trouble working could leave. I had a lot to do and didn't really see the point, so I stayed. Later that day the news came out that our public schools were going to be closed the next day. They said that the schools have a noticable Muslim population and they thought it would be best for everyone if there was a cooling down day.
When I picked up the kids, they had notes saying that the topic had not been discussed at all in school and we were to deal with it as we thought best. I asked my kids why they were getting the next day off, and my daughter replied "because its my birthday", and then said something about getting ready for open house. At that time my kids were in fourth grade and kindergarten, so I just kept the news off TV and didn't say much.
The next day I took the kids to mass. It was the regular day the Catholic school kids in my parish go to mass, and this was the 8th grader's special mass, kind of like a ring mass, but with some other token. The place was packed with folks who aren't usually at such stuff. I remember going to mass that Sunday and the place being packed. The hymns included America the Beautiful, Amazing Grace and Let There Be Peace on Earth and everyone sang. What a shame it takes something like that to pack the churches and get people to sing.
When I picked up the kids, they had notes saying that the topic had not been discussed at all in school and we were to deal with it as we thought best. I asked my kids why they were getting the next day off, and my daughter replied "because its my birthday", and then said something about getting ready for open house. At that time my kids were in fourth grade and kindergarten, so I just kept the news off TV and didn't say much.
The next day I took the kids to mass. It was the regular day the Catholic school kids in my parish go to mass, and this was the 8th grader's special mass, kind of like a ring mass, but with some other token. The place was packed with folks who aren't usually at such stuff. I remember going to mass that Sunday and the place being packed. The hymns included America the Beautiful, Amazing Grace and Let There Be Peace on Earth and everyone sang. What a shame it takes something like that to pack the churches and get people to sing.
Thursday, September 07, 2006
Too Much Parenting?
I've sometimes wondered if kids today are getting too much parenting, and that is one of the subjects de jour on the alumni listserve for my alma mater, Mississippi University for Women. How much should parents be involved in their kids' lives, particularly older kids? I know I had much more independence as a pre-teen and teen than my kids do. When I was my daughter's age, I walked a mile to school every day, and if I didn't show up one day, the teacher expected a note from my mom the next. My daughter's bus stop is 1/2 mile from the house and about six kids get on there. I drive her over there every morning, and as long as there is a crowd of kids there, I'll leave her--but several of the moms stay, and this is a middle school. It is also a magnet school, and on our way to the bus stop we pass the bus stop for the kids who go to the neighborhood school. There are no moms there--and not a huge number of kids. One of the moms at my daughter's bus stop said that when her older kids attended the neighborhood middle and high school they chose to walk, since they could leave later in the morning.
My son's school has a website on which the teachers post lesson plans (including homework) and grades. Parents are urged to check it weekly. When I was in high school my parent's saw my grades at report card time, unless I chose to show them earlier. Now, all schools I know of have interim reports--sort of like report cards that inform the parents half way through the nine weeks if the student is in danger of failing. Information is a good thing, but can you get too much of it? Where do you draw the line between informing parents and making school into the parents' responsibility rather than the students'? I'll be the first to admit that my son's homework is my responsibility. Now, he is mildly autistic, and with that comes organizational issues and attention issues. I'm not sure how much homework he'd get done if I wasn't right on top of him--and I'm paying too much for this school to let him fail. I'm not really sure what "normal" is. My son gets all that help; my daughter, who was student of the year at her school last year doesn't, but I'm smart enough to know that neither one of them is normal.
The almuni listserve is discussing "helicopter parents"--those who hover over their children, even when those children are in college. I went off to college to be on my own. I loved my parents dearly but I was ready for independence. The college administrators on the listserve talk about college kids still leashed to their parents by cell phones--who still expect their parents to solve their problems. I want to raise kids who can think on their feet and solve their own problems. I love my kids, but I want to put myself out of a job one day.
My son's school has a website on which the teachers post lesson plans (including homework) and grades. Parents are urged to check it weekly. When I was in high school my parent's saw my grades at report card time, unless I chose to show them earlier. Now, all schools I know of have interim reports--sort of like report cards that inform the parents half way through the nine weeks if the student is in danger of failing. Information is a good thing, but can you get too much of it? Where do you draw the line between informing parents and making school into the parents' responsibility rather than the students'? I'll be the first to admit that my son's homework is my responsibility. Now, he is mildly autistic, and with that comes organizational issues and attention issues. I'm not sure how much homework he'd get done if I wasn't right on top of him--and I'm paying too much for this school to let him fail. I'm not really sure what "normal" is. My son gets all that help; my daughter, who was student of the year at her school last year doesn't, but I'm smart enough to know that neither one of them is normal.
The almuni listserve is discussing "helicopter parents"--those who hover over their children, even when those children are in college. I went off to college to be on my own. I loved my parents dearly but I was ready for independence. The college administrators on the listserve talk about college kids still leashed to their parents by cell phones--who still expect their parents to solve their problems. I want to raise kids who can think on their feet and solve their own problems. I love my kids, but I want to put myself out of a job one day.
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