Yesterday I picked my son up from school. After the usual pleasantries came the usual question: How is the homework? He said it was fine, that he had gotten some done while he was at the library, and that he had a report assigned in English. He had to write about some aspect of daily life in the time of Julius Ceasar or in the time of Shakespeare (guess what they are studying?). I asked if he needed any help and he said "I was trying to decide whether to ask you for help. I kind of like being responsible for my own homework". I pointed out that part of being responsible was asking for help when needed and so he did ask for some help. He wanted to to Shakespeare's time, so I suggested he research Elizabethan games. He has started his report. I guess backing off was the right decision.
Actually I've seen other signs too. He usually goes to the local library after school and waits for me there for about an hour and a half. However, they are closed on Friday. Luckily, the video game club meets Friday after school until 5:00, which is when I get there. Unfortunately, two weeks ago video game club was cancelled. He called me at 3:00 and told me it was cancelled and said he'd wait for me in front of the library. I didn't like the idea of him sitting out there for an hour and a half so I tied up things at work and left to pick him up. When I got there he was sitting on the steps doing his homework, and when he got into the car he continued to work on that assignment. This is such a difference from having to be pushed, pulled, cajoled, threatened etc.
Now if I can just get the other one to get with the program.