Sunday, March 22, 2009

My Review: Katt's in the Cradle

As noted in the tour post, this is a story about four minister's wives who have become friends and who meet forty miles from their small town to give each other support and friendship.

I enjoyed the book. While I didn't particularly identify with any of the women, all four seemed real. The book dealt with problems suffered in many marriages like infertility, mental illness in the family, the decision to have (or not have)another baby, illegitimate children and alcoholism. It also focused on problems unique to those married to those in ministry, like the feeling of living in a fishbowl, jealousy between and among church members and making time for a spouse.

A couple of things I'd like to point out. One of the wives suffered from infertility. While that wasn't a big part of this book, evidently it was in one of the earlier books. She sought counsel from the local Catholic priest at that time, and they have remained friends.

Also, at one point in the book, the wives are at a larger meeting of preacher's wives and the following is read: "80% of pastor's wives feel left out an unappreciated by church members. 70% do not have someone they consider a close friend....1500 pastors leave the ministry each month due to moral failure, spiritual burnout, or contention in their churches.... 50% of pastors are so discouraged that they would leave the ministry if they could, but have no other way of making a living....a majority of pastors' wives said the most destructive even that has occurred in their marriage and family was the day thier husbands entered the ministry." I am assuming the authors quoted real studies here; that they did not make up these figures for the sake of the story. If true, they support thet contention I made in the last post; that substituting married clergy for celibate doesn't eliminate problems, it just changes them.

1 comment:

  1. I once befriended a minster's wife. WE started to become quite close. Then one day it ended. I think the thought of becoming so close to someone who was not of the same religion made her think that I would ruin their ministry (we had the conversation in a subtle way). It was a wonderful friendship- I still miss it!


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